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The blogs of a guy who quit his job, sold or gave away all of his possessions, joined the Peace Corps and moved to the tiny island Kingdom of Tonga. This is his (and only) his story.
 
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8.07.2005

Just another tequilla Sunday...

Or so I'd like to believe. I had every intention of writing some novel tonight for the blog, but, like every other time I get on my computer, I get crazy, break something very important or can't get something essential to work and end up forgetting why I started using my comptuer in the fist place at all.

Well I'm just about to call it a night and I start going through my web statistics. Its this weird thing I like to do with my free time. I don't know how to explain it or whatever, but I do know that I like doing it. So I'm looking through my stats when I stumble upon this little beauty just staring me in the face:

"Tongan Porn"

Now if I were in any country in the world, I wouldn't even glance twice, but for some reason I just find this funny as hell. First off, the concept of Tongan Porn is what I would classify as an oxymoron because if their is one thing that I will never see so long as I live it is a Tongan Porn. Tongans can't even hold hands in public, how the hell are they going to film themselves bumping uglies and then distribute it via the internet? Impossible. This country is just too damned sexually repressed, religious and mildly incestuous to boot. The fact that someone on the internet actually went looking for this in the hopes that something would turn up I find absolutely astounding. If there really was Tongan Porn on the internet, I'm sure that whoever was doing the searching would inevitably find a family member and be related to the star or starlett in some manor of fashion that would make the next kai polo VERY uncomfortable for everyone. The country just ain't that big.

Secondly, why the hell did my site show up in search for Tongan Porn? (Solution: Click here to find out... bottom of the page) Well that would explain it. Its something so rarely searched for that I make it on the top ten list. Also, as I'm not directly related to porn and the idiot doing the search obviously didn't remember to turn off the adult content filter so they could actually FIND a porn site speaks to me in so many ways. I am reassured that the search was a rookie internet searching Tongan. I bet if I checked my logs for an IP I could actually make a reasonable guess about who the person searching was. (Yeah, Tonga is that small sometimes)

Thirdididly, ITS SUNDAY! Someone in Tonga did NOT go to church today. Rather, they spent their entire Sunday searching on the internet for Tongan Porn. Tsk, Tsk, Tsk.... Kovi Aupito Tamasi'i! 'Uli Lahi Aupito! Sabate! A very loud and rousing fire and brimstone session was most definitely not paid attention to.

Funny Stuff. Speaking of funny stuff, I heard this great very, very fakatonga story this weekend. A Tongan man was recently put in jail here in Tonga for sleeping with a police officers wife. The charge placed against said man: "Sleeping with a police officer's wife". (Which is of course not enforcable, but the charge was nevertheless placed) This country is oh so one of a kind.

Much love. - Misi

PS - I've emailed the bored.com people about adding Tongan Porn to the list of oxymorons. I'm hoping we'll make it!
2 comments - Post a Comment
  • Jimbo Dad and I read your site, Dad was up late hoping to catch some Tongan Porn, He hasn't slept a wink all night in hopes of finding the site. Love and Miss you Lizzie
    # posted by Anonymous : 8/10/2005 1:29 PM
  • best.oxymoron.evar.

    so have you been striking with the rest of your fellow workers? Or not allowed to b/c of PC? Interesting times ahead for Tonga, eh.
    # posted by nicole : 8/11/2005 11:48 PM